day no. 16,741: marriage militant

"Now I do not compare marriage with war, but I do compare marriage with law or liberty or patriotism or popular government, or any of the human ideals which have often to be defended by war. Even the wildest of those ideals, which seem to escape from all the discipline of peace, do not escape from the discipline of war. The Bolshevists may have aimed at pure peace and liberty; but they have been compelled, for their own purpose, first to raise armies and then to rule armies. In a word, however beautiful you may think your own visions of beatitude, men must suffer to be beautiful, and even suffer a considerable interval of being ugly. And I have no notion of denying that mankind suffers much from the maintenance of the standard of marriage; as it suffers much from the necessity of criminal law or the recurrence of crusades and revolutions. The only question here is whether marriage is indeed, as I maintain, an ideal and an institution making for popular freedom; I do not need to be told that anything making for popular freedom has to be paid for in vigilance and pain, and a whole army of martyrs." ― G.K. Chesterton, The Superstition of Divorce

It is precisely because marriage is meaningful that is must also be costly. It is too valuable a thing to be honored by trifles. It is painful and difficult and glorious and beautiful, like childbirth. No one advocating for the value of marriage should be surprised that some don't see that value or want to pay a premium for it, but neither should anyone advocating for the value of marriage try to remedy this sales resistance by marketing a knock-off version of marriage for cheapskates. 

Hebrews 13:4

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for God will judge the immoral and adulterous.

You do not honor marriage by underselling it. You do not elevate it in the eyes of others by making it less necessary to enter into or easier to exit if regretted. In other words, marriage cannot be rightly pursued on a lay-away plan or lightly returned on an extended warranty.

"The man who makes a vow makes an appointment with himself at some distant time or place. The danger of it is that himself should not keep the appointment." ― G.K. Chesterton

Marriage does a man the honor of taking him at his word. It holds him to what he said. The danger is that the man may ask others to treat him less nobly. He might beg to void his vow and strike his integrity from the record and only hate for him would grant such a request.

"Marriage is a duel to the death which no man of honour should decline.” ― G.K. Chesterton

Marriage is rightly fought for and defended because marriage is a fight. It is a war against selfishness and will require sacrifice. The history of marriage is littered with martyrs. Many have lived and died for the sake of marriage. They gladly kept their vows till death did them part. Martyrs love something enough to die for it and marriage is a duel to the death.