The purpose in a
man's heart is like deep water,
but a man of
understanding will draw it out.
Our children are deep wells. Don't skim the surface, but do the work of lowering the bucket in order to draw out the deepest thoughts and hopes and fears of your child's heart. Don't abandon their heart as brackish. Draw it out as you would cold, clear water on a dry, dusty day.
Even a child makes
himself known by his acts,
by whether his
conduct is pure and upright.
If you are tempted to worry that you won't be competent to get the bucket deep enough to draw out their heart, simply pay attention. Some things can't stay down. Like a beach ball being held under water, they desire to come up no matter how hard anyone tries to hold them down. Simply be around and pay attention. Their little hearts will faithfully erupt and their regular actions will leak the deeper parts of their hearts.
Work hard to draw them out and be around to witness the clockwork eruptions of their geysers. Their hearts want to be pursued which is why they hide -- and why they explode. Their desire is to be known.