day no. 15,168: a wrested development

Genesis 32:22-32 
The same night he arose and took his two wives, his two female servants, and his eleven children, and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. He took them and sent them across the stream, and everything else that he had. And Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket, and Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, “Let me go, for the day has broken.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” And he said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob.” Then he said, “Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with men, and have prevailed.” Then Jacob asked him, “Please tell me your name.” But he said, “Why is it that you ask my name?” And there he blessed him. So Jacob called the name of the place Peniel, saying, “For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life has been delivered.” The sun rose upon him as he passed Penuel, limping because of his hip. Therefore to this day the people of Israel do not eat the sinew of the thigh that is on the hip socket, because he touched the socket of Jacob's hip on the sinew of the thigh.

Jacob's name meant "deceiver/heel grabber." His identity was connected to his proximity to his sin and for most of his life the distance between the two was quite minimal. But here God gives him a new identity, "Israel", which means "wrestles/struggles with God." This new identity is not based on how close he is to sin, but how close he is to God. Wrestling requires contact and on this night he came into contact with God Almighty.

Previously, Jacob was defined by his sins. He was a liar and a deceiver; and even if he walked away from that past, he was merely "less deceitful." That is to say, his orientation was still centered around sin. He was defined by how near or far from sin he was as his life orbited by definition around his sin.That is until this night. On this night, he came into contact with God and was given a new way of seeing himself, a new orientation, a new orbit, a life defined by his distance from God and on this night, the distance was nonexistent. He was so close to God that he was in constant contact with Him. That is his new identity: nearness to God.

And yet, he did not come away from that closeness unscathed. No one ever does. No one who comes into contact with God walks away with a strut. If your life is defined by your distance from sin, you may find yourself strutting around due to the distance you've placed between yourself and your sins, but no one who defines themselves by their proximity to God walks around like they own the place. They know the One whose Name is on the title and deed. He is the owner of the world and everything in it, including them. The paperwork has been filed with Heaven's DMV, the local church. He is registered now as a new vehicle, under new ownership with a new name on the title of his life, transferable on death to the hope of resurrection alone.