Christ Church Leavenworth
WLC 144: A Charitable Esteem of Our Neighbors
March 22, 2026
A Charitable Esteem of Our Neighbors
INTRODUCTION
This morning we are continuing our study of Q144 of the WLC which asks, “What are the duties required in the ninth commandment?” The ninth commandment, as you recall, is “You shall not bear false witness” and the duties associated with it, according to the answer provided by the Westminster divines, are as follows: “the preserving and promoting of truth between man and man, and the good name of our neighbour, as well as our own; appearing and standing for the truth; and from the heart, sincerely, freely, clearly, and fully, speaking the truth, and only the truth, in matters of judgment and justice, and in all other things whatsoever; a charitable esteem of our neighbours; loving, desiring, and rejoicing in their good name; sorrowing for, and covering of their infirmities; freely acknowledging of their gifts and graces, defending their innocency; a ready receiving of a good report, and unwillingness to admit of an evil report, concerning them; discouraging tale-bearers, flatterers, and slanderers; love and care of our own good name, and defending it when need requireth; keeping of lawful promises; and studying and practicing of whatsoever things are true, honest, lovely, and of good report.”
The phrase on which we will be focusing this morning is, “a charitable esteem of our neighbours” and the text we will be using to frame our discussion is Ephesians 4:29, these are the words of God: “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
There are two ways to love our neighbor with our words. One is to not say hurtful things about them or to them. The other is to say encouraging things about them or to them. One of the most discouraging things you can do to your neighbor is to speak ill of them to others in their presence. Conversely, one of the most uplifting things you can do is to praise them to others in their presence.
So, fathers, make sure you are regularly praising your children. Look for things to reward with kind words. Do not allow yourself to become the stereotype the Freudians say that you are. God the Father is not cold or distant, and you should not be either. This is, however, a besetting sin of fathers, as the Bible points out. In Ephesians 6:4, it says this: "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord,” and in Colossians 3:21 it says this: “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” In both cases, you end up with an angry, discouraged child. Father hunger is the result of too many critical words and not enough encouragement. So, look for ways to charitably esteem your kids. Do not raise them in doubt. Believe the best about them. Raise them in faith by showing them how to have some. Do not camp on the most difficult parts of their character. If you are tempted to think of your children in terms of their cost, do better PR work for them in your own soul. Do not let your heart run a smear campaign on them. Block those messages.
We are called to love our neighbors as ourselves. And whose sins do we know better than our own? Yet we still love ourselves and that is because love covers a multitude of sins. Let us then do for others what we’re already doing for ourselves. We should think as well of our neighbors as we can. Granted, some of them make this harder for us than others, but we aren’t talking about their duty to be as lovable and respectable as they can this morning, we are talking about your duty to give them as much love and respect as you can.
We should do our best to make a case for our neighbor because building a case against them in our hearts is a sin. In fact, it is satanic. Satan is “the accuser of the brothers” according to Revelation 12:10. He does not carry water for anyone. He spends his time looking for things to be upset about, and as a result, he is always upset. And if we are not careful, we can fall into those same satanic trap. When we envy others, we are slow to see their merits. Why did they get that? They don’t deserve it. When we are bitter towards others, we are eager to entertain accusations about them. Ugh, that sounds like something he would do. We often convict our neighbors of wrongdoing in the courtrooms of our hearts without giving them a fair trial. We accept speculation as testimony, we allow hearsay to be submitted into evidence, and we don’t allow them to defend themselves. We don’t make a case for them. But that is not how God deals with us.
Psalm 103:13-14: “As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.” Remember your neighbor’s frame. He gets scared, just like you. He gets stressed out, just like you. He fails to plan sometimes, just like you. He says things he shouldn’t, just like you. He forgets to say things he should, just like you. He even forgets to use his blinker sometimes, just like you have. If you need any help being charitable with your neighbor, look no further than the charitable esteem you give to the neighbor you know the best: the one that looks back at you in the mirror each morning. And then remember how much charity our Father in Heaven extends to that guy. Who are we that God is mindful of us? How have we captured His attention and even gained His affection? He extends a charitable esteem to us. That’s how. He loves the unlovely. He is kind to the unkind. He remembers that we are dust, but He doesn’t treat us like dirt. He knows that we are beneath Him, and so He bends down to be with us. And that is how we must treat our neighbors. Remember their frame and then frame them in the best light possible.
CALL TO CONFESSION
Well, since we are better at looking to our own interests than we are at looking to the interests of others and since we are better at giving ourselves the benefit of the doubt than we are at giving that benefit to others, we are reminded of our need to regularly confess our sins, whether they be related to this duty or to others. So, if you are able, please kneel with me and confess your sins, first privately, and then corporately using the prayer found in your bulletin.
CORPORATE CONFESSION
Almighty and merciful Father, we confess that we are by nature sinful and unclean. We have sinned against You in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done and what we have left undone. We have not loved You with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We justly deserve Your present and eternal punishment. We are truly sorry and we humbly repent. For the sake of Your Son, Jesus Christ, have mercy on us and forgive us. Renew us and lead us by Your Holy Spirit so that we may delight in Your will and walk in Your ways to the glory of Your holy name. Amen.
DECLARATION OF PARDON
Arise and hear the Good News! The assurance of pardon today comes from Galatians 2:16 “We know that a person is not justified by works of the law but through faith in Jesus Christ, so we also have believed in Christ Jesus, in order to be justified by faith in Christ and not by works of the law, because by works of the law no one will be justified.” We are not loved because we were lovely, we are becoming more and more lovely because God has loved us. He has not treated us as our sins have deserved. He has been charitable in His esteem for us. While we were yet sinners, He died for us and while we were still His enemies, He looked for ways to be friendly. O, what a friend we have in Jesus, for in Him our sins are forgiven… THANKS BE TO GOD!
Now let us ascend to the presence of God in all worship and praise.
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