day no. 15,813: a prize of war

Jeremiah 45:5
And do you seek great things for yourself? Seek them not, for behold, I am bringing disaster upon all flesh, declares the LORD. But I will give you your life as a prize of war in all places to which you may go.

Mark 8:35
For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel's will save it. 

The one who prizes his life above all others loses what he gains. The one who confesses his life as a disaster is rewarded with his life as a reward of war. Whoever seeks to save his life or justify its existence on its own merit falls short. Whoever surrenders his life by staking his reputation on God's grace receives back the life he laid down. God has so designed the world to revolve around resurrection power. Only that which is laid down in faith will be raised up in reward. That which is held up in pride will be knocked down as a result. 

This won't be easy. This will be a war. But if you fight against your desire to save yourself, you will find yourself saved. The one who seeks first the kingdom receives all other things, their soul included. The one who seeks first his own kingdom loses his kingdom, everything else and worse yet, his own soul.