This morning while mom was away getting her hair cut and colored, you and I had a chat. You were holding three small army figures, one of which was Penelope's. She was asking to have hers back, but you kept denying her request. She was getting frustrated and you were digging your heels in more and more with each repeated request from your sister.
I intervened and asked you to return her toy to her. You began justifying your decision and that she was wrong to ask for her toy back. After talking it through, you gave Penelope back her toy and then put a cherry on top by throwing the two other army guys on the table and stomping away.
I called you back. You wanted to be done, but I wanted you dig in. I asked why when things get hard you often resist and hold out until you concede and then stomp off and refuse to participate. Rather than play with the two toys you do have, you quit because you can't have all three.
This led to a discussion about sin, selfishness, repentance, doing good and going to hell.
Having recently had a conversation with you that ended in your concession that you deserved to go to hell for your sin, but a refusal to repent today when you were hearing God's voice, I revisited that interaction and stated that today you could repent rather than delaying it any longer and remaining in peril.
You softened. Before my eyes, I saw your hard exterior soften as we discussed the reality of sin and hell and what would happen if you got what deserved from God. This led to discussing what God has done in sending His Son to do what you could not do and die for what you should not have done. He took what you deserved. Rather than you dying in your place for your own sin, He died in your place for your sin and can this day be received by those who call out to Him.
Your countenance changed. Rather than digging your heels in to resist, you leaned in to receive. You welcomed my pursuit. You agreed to my offer to pray for you and being led to receive Jesus' life, death and resurrection as your only hope in life and in death.
We prayed. You confessed your inability to save your self, your stubbornness in often attempting to justify yourself and Jesus death as the only thing that can justify you.
I watched you turn from death to life before my eyes. The atmosphere behind your eyes changed. The tone of your words transformed. Your presence felt light, as if you could fly away if your pants were not weighing you down.
I love you, my son. We discussed, in keeping with orthodox Christianity and this being Reformation month, that Luther's first of the 95 theses emphasized that the entire Christian life is one of repentance. It is not a one and down proposition. It is believing and receiving every day. I reminded you how desperately and daily your dad needs Jesus. I gave my life to Him years ago and give it back to Him everyday. I sin and repent. I sin less in some ways than I used to, but I do not need Him any less. I could see that you understood.
I am so proud of you, Finneas. I am excited to help you repent again today and every day for the rest of our days together here on God's green earth. May this be not the only time you repent, but the first of as many days you live that you depend upon Him, confessing your lack and His fullness by grace through faith offered to you.
We capped it off by listening to "By His Grace" by the Dispatch. A song you used to request ALL THE TIME. The words are fitting for the occasion.
"By His Grace"
The Dispatch
We were dead in our path
We were sinful sons of wrath
Following a crooked road
We were lost and wandering souls
We couldn't choose righteousness
We couldn't save ourselves from death
But the God of grace, rich in love
Gave his life with Jesus
By His grace, by His grace, we are saved
Not by works, or by words, but by faith
In Jesus' name
We have peace in Jesus Christ
He has brought us to His side
He raised us up, gave us life
And seated us with Him on high
The perfect king, the God of love
Adopted us through His own Son
He brought us in, gave us faith
He made us sons and daughters
By His grace, by His grace, we are saved
Not by works, or by words, but by faith
In Jesus' name
By His grace, by His grace, we are saved
Not by works, or by words, but by faith
In Jesus' name
Jesus died to give us life
Brought from dark into the light
Righteous in the Father's sight
By the grace of Christ
By His grace, by His grace, we are saved
Not by works, or by words, but by faith
In Jesus' name
By His grace, by His grace, we are saved
Not by works, or by words, but by faith
In Jesus' name
Songwriters: Augustus M. Toplady / Brian Rogers / Richard Redhead
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